ENERGETICS OF SEXUAL HEALING
Love is the greatest healer.
Sex, as an expression of pure love, is deeply healing.
Love brings us together in unity… when we are whole, we are healed.
Healing, wholeness, and holy (referring to the sacred), all come from the same root word.
Two ways love makes us more whole:
- when we come to love and accept more of ourselves.
- when we come to truly love another and expand our sense of self and become a greater whole.
How then is/can the sexual act be a vehicle for love?
- The energetics of healing
- Sexual energetics
Part 1: the energetics of healing
The energetics of healing asks we think of our body as an energy system comprising of several layers.
Our body is a collection of electromagnetic vibrations, the physical body being the grossest manifestation, while the emotional body, and the mental body being ever more subtle. Then there is the intangible aspect of your being that we can call spirit or soul.
Because the human energy matrix has such depth, it is possible to live on the surface of experience. Our birth and subsequent awakening process is characterized by gradually bringing into consciousness more of our being. Further, our energy body carries memory… a genetic memory, a karmic memory, a legacy of trauma and unprocessed emotion. It’s all stored within our human energy matrix.
The human energy matrix has several main energy centers that store energy and information and give access to certain dimensions of experience, there are 6 main energy centers in the body, and an additional one outside the body above the crown.
Through an individual’s experience and exploration of these energy centers they give access to deeper layers of experience … one can think of it as new dimensions of consciousness.
New and old… for the deep memory of our existence is stored in our energy field, and it is through the inner work of bringing to light (truth) and love (acceptance) of our wholeness that we heal.
The deepest healing is not in the physical, but the subtle dimensions … emotion, mind, and the intangible spirit.
Everything is connected and a change on the level of mind, will reverberate through emotion and the physical body.
There is much to say… let’s focus on trauma and unprocessed emotion in this lifetime for this article.
Since your birth you have a memory of experience stored on multiple levels of our being and body. Early childhood experience imprints the bodymind with certain programs of being and relating to self and other, giving way to attachment styles, conditioned behaviours, programmed likes and dislikes, and the possibility of an accumulation of emotional blockages.
An emotional blockage is a memory from a point in the past when an emotion arose that was not felt, often due to it being unwanted or the bodymind was unable to process it for a good reason at the time. When stored emotion is in the system it prevents the flow of new emotion from coming in. The emotion will remain stored until a later date when an individual is ready to go back in and feel what was left, which brings its release. Though stored emotion can be positive and negative, much of humanities unprocessed emotion is negative.
To heal then, is to come back to the memory of stored emotion from this lifetime and recieve the emotional memory, and the wisdom that comes from processing the event in the past and the subsequent meaning it offers your life in the present…essentially repatterning, changing neural circuits, and signaling to the nervous system that the event is in the past. The last point is important, because if the unprocessed emotion is fear, the bodymind may have a low level of fear within its field until the memory of that incident is complete and the bodymind time stamps that event as in the past, signifying to the bodymind that it is safe. Held fear in the body or any other negative or dense emotional state will be felt in the present and projected onto current events.
As you may gather, if an individual has a large amount of unprocessed fear, guilt, and shame, they will carry these emotions with them on a low level, waiting to be triggered or heard and seen, in the present moment. Being triggered easily by certain emotions is often the body trying to send a message that something needs to be heard and seen.
Much of the negative emotions of fear, guilt, and shame are stored in the energy body at the level of the lower 3 energy centers, which are location in the pelvic floor, genitals, and stomach.
The way we access these layers of unprocessed emotion in the energy body is through the breath. The breath is a vehicle for consciousness to move within itself and to feel, and subsequently to heal.
As a side note, I’m a breathworker, and I’m sure after reading this you can understand the mechanism of breathwork in healing.
By inviting energy and attention into the deeper layers of the energy body and the places of stored memory and emotion in the lower part of the physical body, an individual has the opportunity to feel the lost peices of themselves and return to wholeness.
Quick note: because there are lots parts of ourselves, it does not mean we are broken. One because we are not simply the body or the mind, though we have them, we are also our perfect unblemished spirit (all is one). The process of incarnation is to explore and know ourselves, it’s one of falling apart and coming together in greater wholeness.
Question: if all this energy and emotion is stored in the pelvic floor, genitals, and stomach, why when I touch it, can I not feel it?
Because the body is infinitely wise and has armouring. You have many layers and dimensions of your energy, if you are touching yourself and you cannot feel what is beneath, then you are not touching yourself at the level of that stored emotion. The body is also wise in that it will not bring up a large trauma or unprocessed emotion unless it feels safe, and you are ready… it has it’s own innate intelligence. Through the healing journey individual’s come more and more in tune with the innate intelligence that runs through their body, and is accessed by the breath and turning within.
In the breathwork I teach, when an individual feels safe, and when they are ready to feel and heal what is in them, then it happens and the emotion that is most relevant for them to move forward arises. It is beautiful.
Now that we have touched upon the energetics of healing, let’s explore sex.
Part 2: sexual energetic healing
When two individuals come together in love, there is beautiful healing. – for this article I will be discussing sex between a male and female, because it’s easier to stick to one example, and I’m speaking both from knowledge and experience.
Love is the vibrational frequency of union, of saftey, and of wholeness.
Love offers a safe energy field for two individuals to get to know the deeper aspects of themselves and one another -another peice of themselves-
Even without sex, one gains greater access to see themselves and to know themselves through love. Energy centers open up, and energy and information activates in one’s energy field.
Ordinarily there are psychic defense and armoring that prevents an individual from seeing themselves or allowing others to see them…but love has an eye of truth and if two individual feel safe to explore, then there is nothing that cannot be known and felt.
The sex act is an intimate experience of exploring consciousness. Lovers may touch all over, activating energy and emotion.
As mentioned, we store a great deal of unprocessed emotion in the pelvic floor, genitals, and stomach (lower 3 energy centers), which is the place of penetration for the woman and activation in the man. When male and female make love in love, deeper layers of themselves may be opened.
If the sex act is held as a sacred container, the space is held for sexual healing.
As you may experienced or are imagining, sexual healing is not the kind of sex one finds on porn websites. Sacred sex is a intimate and deep listening, it may involve layers of unprocessed emotion being released and the two lovers creating space, pauses, breaks, and whatever is needed to tenderly care for the other in their process.
I began to use the word sacred and I would like to highlight it, because the deepest healing is when two individual connect mental, emotionally, physically, and at the level of soul or spirit. Then, the container can truly be held for sacred sexuality and an honouring of the divine reflecting the divine.
Two awakened beings in love are liberated to make animal love, human love, and divine love to one another. The sexual has many dimensions, and through the exploration energy centers and activations in the energy body are being opened.
Even if an individual is not fully anchored in their soul or spirit, the sex act may be a place for finding their soul, or finding their alignment and path.
Love is the doorway into the divine.
Remaining thoughts on sexual healing:
- to create sacred space, invite in earth, water, wind, and fire. Make the union conscious and intentional.
- release of emotion involves full expression, an encouragement to utilize expression, especially of the voice through expressing emotion and moaning during the sex act, it will held to open the channel for release.
- begin with stretching or dancing, mediation and breathwork… once more, it will open the body and connect the lovers.
- be sure to find completion and integration after the love making…as well as integration, sexual healing may be deep, and the reverberations and changes may take root for days or weeks.
- to better create the conditons for healing…learning tantra, energy work, and the healing arts are beneficial.
- follow your soul and spirit, in all things.
If you have any questions I am a breathworker, tantra teacher, and guide for those on the path, many blessings.
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