Magnolia

Magnolia

Her trembling stare
Still pierces

Waking up and still dreaming
Your silent call left no echo

Why is all I can ask
The depth of emotion is like this magnolia tree

Blossoming white and too proud
Loud signs signal a wavering spirit without a voice

Your choice
And the fire you left burning

Your departing gift is too much to stomach
Legacy of foot prints

Come and gone like the fallen magnolia flowers

A circle of humanity
Broken inside
Connected by pain
My sorrows are held by the rain
Yet I wish it would thunder
And pour and pour

We still stand and hold the pain
In our bodies you remain

When does this cycle end?
When will this heart mend?

I tend
I tend
I sow and see
How we cannot be free
Untill all are released from the trauma we carry

Eventually ill know why
When I’m finished this cry
And processed what needs to die

Free us from the lie
Let the truth emerge
And I will purge

Go home safely
I’ll see you again some day

For now, all I can do is rest in this weary body
And light a candle for those that are still here

The rain is falling heavy now
The magnolia tree will grow strong this year

Channeled Conversations with the Self

When you’re tired of searching you’ll come home to these words.
There’s something familiar here.
Come home.

Where you feel at ease.
Breathe.. calm as a cool breeze.

Behind these words is a light.
Crawling into bed and everything alright.
Wrapped in familiar sheets.
Remember that there are things that never dull with repeated use.
Hold the one’s you love.

Emotions flow.
Yesterdays sorrow dripped from earth and sky.
All of nature knows how to cry.

Tomorrow never comes.
Don’t delay the garden.
Plant in Spring and live in harmony with the cycles.
A time to dance and a time to rest.
A time to tik tok and a time meditate.
Isn’t that how she goes?

I let go of a belief today.
I feel light.
Reality looks brighter when I see it without a filter.

I’m turning now.
Mind is yearning for romance.
Can body come too?
Let’s ask the heart.

Patience.
It’s not waiting, it’s cultivating.

A bird told me to let go of fantasy.
And heal the relationship with my mother.

Walk before you dance.
Learn the way of loving the self before you try and tango with another.
When will I know I’m ready?

When you surrender all desire.
Does that mean I won’t want it?
Just the parts of you who want to use love.

Learn to recognize what cannot be hidden.
Is that a riddle?
Peek a boo.
Remember now?

Remember how you loved your mom with your whole heart
Have you ever loved another with such purity?
Do you remember when your love became lessened?
Heal this part of yourself and know a love that is True.

I don’t always feel as though I belong here.
Where?
Here, where I live…where should I live?
In the heart. It is your home and your compass.
I try and live and listen to my heart.
Stop trying.

Who am I?
Close your eyes, what do you see?
Nothing.
No one.

What is my purpose?
What are you doing right now?
Huh..
Entertain this …. Your purpose is always what you are doing right now. You simply need to be totally surrendered in your being to feel complete. From a place of wholeness, you living your purpose will unfold naturally.

What can you tell me about past lives?
What would you like to know?
Is there any past lives that I should know about that are blocking my growth that you can share with me?
All the most pertinent areas of your growing are available in the experiences you have had in this lifetime, they contain the hologram of past lives.

What can I do to better contribute to the health and healing of the planet?
Become whole.
How will this help?
Stop trying to help the world as if it were something separate from you and become one with creation, from this wholeness of being, all action will unfold in accordance with destiny.

Is destiny real? What about Free will!?
Who says there is one destiny?
How is that destiny if there is more than one?
There are many dimensions to existence and experience.
I get it.

I feel complete.
My mind is clear.
Thank you.

The HeART and Breath of Tantra

So I’m writing a book!
It’s the 3rd book I’ll have written.
I may actually edit and release this one! haha.

This one is called the HeArt and Breath of Tantra and in it I explore 10 Tantric Techniques to realize your True Nature and release conditioning and programming. These techniques are simple and can often be practiced throughout your day or during your everyday life. I chose to name it as I have because I emphasis 3 key points to understanding the techniques of Tantra…through the heart (love), art (beauty), and breath (present moment). Tantra is not a philosophy, it is a way of being in the world. This book will give you many tools and practices to enter into life more totally and connect with your true potential.

Want a taste?

(drop your email for updates)

Here is one of the techniques.

Technique # 48

At the start of sexual union keep attentive on the fire in the beginning, and so continuing, avoid the embers in the end.

This is an essential Tantric sex technique that can also be applied to your sex pleasure and cultivation practice. There are a few important things to understand about the tantric way of being in the world. Tantra is about applying techniques to realize our True Nature. The nature we had before our conditioning, before the world taught us who we were, before we had desires, before we knew about right or wrong. Such a way of knowing/being is difficult for most to grasp because our beliefs are deeply ingrained in the way our subconscious processes information and creates perception. Take the idea of sexuality for example, over generations much has been taught about sexuality; certain religious traditions, authorities, or simply overarching societal norms have imposed ways of being and acting that have ingrained ideas in you about right or wrong. Who to love and what are acceptable acts of sexuality. The conditioning even runs so deep as to influence what you find beautiful. For example, at different times in history and in different parts of the world it was beautiful to carry a copious amount of bodyfat because it indicated that one was wealthy enough to afford to eat well, whereas the dominant view in most Western Civilization does not keep this same standard.

So then, without a throughout examination of the self to find your truth, it is difficult to see how your conditioning has affected your programmed attractions. In terms of sexuality, the conditioning runs deep for many generations in Western Society as religious traditions have often looked down in various ways and capacities at sexuality, even so far as to associate sex and masturbation with being a sin capable of determining if a person was worthy of God’s grace in heaven. You may not believe that now, but after generations of being suppressed under the authoritative pressures, your DNA and your subconscious still carries remnants from this implicit learning.

Tantra is Amoral. In its purity, it says nothing of right or wrong, and has no moral stance. Because it aims at offering a way for you to come back to your original purity, before all your many lifetimes and remember the True Nature of reality. It is from this original point of purity where you can determine your truth about sexuality. Tantra is known for being associated with Tantric sex because it is one of the spiritual traditions that is open to exploring conscious sexuality.

Conscious sexuality, like Tantra is a vehicle for realizing one’s True Nature. I’m going to circle back to the title of this book, the HeArt and Breath of Tantra because I want offer my original guidance that without love (the heart), and consciousness (the breath), Tantra is a dangerous tool. The techniques of Tantra are a tool, and any tool can be misused as Tantric sex has been misused. Many takes the Amoral stance of Tantra and encouragement of sex as spirituality to justify their desires, actions, and unconscious sexuality.
If Tantra is Amoral, and morals and right and wrong don’t exist, then anything goes right? Not quite, and to best explain this point I’m going to refer to the Taoist tradition which is a philosophical system that originated in China that is similar to Tantra. Taoism too is beyond right or wrong and beyond yin and yang or opposites. The word Tao refers to a path, or the Way, among many other translations. It refers to a way to move through life that cannot be spoken of; no set of rules, dogmas, or morals can describe the motion of the Tao. Taoism speaks of 3 forces, heaven (the stars, planets, sky), Earth below (nature), and the realm of mankind. To be in harmony with the Tao is to be in harmony with oneself (internal), as well as the (external) forces of earth/nature and heaven.
To understand this, I will explore an example… if you go off alone into the forest, there are no rules, and no one will tell you how to talk, walk, and how to have sex. The forces of nature and heaven provide unconditional love and energy for us as humans to explore and create. But, we cannot simply go out into nature is do whatever the fuck we want. Perhaps for a period of time, but what happens when it rains? Or when you get hungry? You will have to learn to live in harmony and co-exist with what is. There are no rules as to how you will get along, in fact, if you set yourself up with rules that become too rigid, then you may get in trouble because nature is always changing! Conversely, if you are too careless and set no rules, you will also run into trouble! This example is just you off in the forest on your own, now we must add that we live in a society of 8 billion people and billions of other animals. So despite not having any rules or morals, there is a Way we each must find for ourselves that is in harmony with the All.

Returning back to our topic of sexuality… there are no true morals. Yet, this does not mean any actions goes because it may violate one’s capacity to stay in harmony with themselves, others, or with earth and sky. This is an important cautionary interlude before diving deeper into sexuality because, as I mentioned, many justify their desires for selfish pleasure, misusing others, and ultimately staying trapped in their conditioning and addictions rather than moving towards their True Nature. Your True Nature is not habitual or addictive, these patterns of behaviour are all conditioned and keep an individual in desire. Desire is an important topic which we will discuss in the next chapter.
Where have we arrived? Sexuality is. It simply is. It is not right or wrong, in the ultimate sense there is no moral underpinnings around sex. And yet, we exist as individuals in time, in society, between heaven and earth, and we must determine our truth and develop a way in the world that is harmonious and keeps us in right relationship with all our relations (all the cosmos!).
Let us now enter into this sutra.

At the start of sexual union keep attentive on the fire in the beginning, and so continuing, avoid the embers in the end.
The beginning of sex is similar to the beginning of falling in love. It is the most beautiful experience, like a thousand blossoming flowers in the mind and body. Sex and love is a doorway into the infinite. It is a true grace that most every person has experienced in their lifetime. And oh so often the story is the same, the start of love and sex is ecstasy, and without tender care, the sex becomes placid and routine, and so follows the bond of love. Many husband and wife share the bed, make love in their standard way, (probably) a set number of thrusts before the male climaxes and the story is over. Both parties receive some pleasure, yet deeper parts of them are left unsatisfied.

The heights of sexuality can satisfy every desire you have… if you have True Tantric sex, you will no longer desire food, water, power, money, or even eternal life! You will be so complete that you will be ready to die. That is a joke. But, seriously, when all your individual’s needs are met, what next? It is natural to want to help others. This is one of the ways that Tantric sex can help you lead a more fulfilling life.

Yet for most couples, sex is not so total. Total sex requires you to be totally awake, every cell must be present. For most people, their genitals are present during sex, but, much of their being is offline. This is why Tantric sex is multidimensional, every chakra is capable of awakening to sex, and the connection must be mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. This is why most of Tantric sexuality is what I term Tantric intimacy, because the sexual union is an energy exchange that need not be limited to the physical bodies. This is the heart of Tantric sex, when it is no longer a routine physical act, but a stage for intimacy. Tantric sex often breaks the standard form of sex by integrating eye gazing, massage, emotional connection and conversation, play, dance, and meditation, etc. There is no beginning and no end. It may last for many hours.

So then, this technique is key, pay attentive to the fire in the beginning. It is up to the partners to fan these flames of love, for two people are humble tenders of the sacred fire of love and their offerings unto this sacred flame are what make possible the heights of sexuality. They are what make possible the cosmic orgasm, which is not an orgasm (expansion and contraction and then release) limited to the genitals, but when the entire body and every cell orgasm’s. Then True union is reached. True union is not when a man enters his sexual organ into a woman, still two separate beings are present in this interaction. True Union is when two beings dissolve their entire being into love. When nothing remains, then union is achieved. And this act need not necessary be paired with sexual intercourse, when one learns Tantric sex, they will learn the art of dissolving into union and can then learn to live at this level of love.

It can now be better explained why many justify their unconscious sexual desires and call it Tantra, they are not actually reaching the heights of union, but rather they are remaining at the level of their personal desire for sense pleasure. It is keeping them from dissolving. It is keeping them from knowing True Nature.
How then to practice Tantric Sex? With love. You cannot have True Union without love. Sex without love is for the senses. There is nothing wrong with it. It is simply not the heights of what is possible. To a sincere individual in search of realization, it is a waste of time and energy. To then practice Tantric sex requires a deeply intimate relationship of love. This starts with yourself. Without discovering and understanding the ways in which you block love from entering into your life – which will be the result of previous conditioning- then you cannot surrender into love. Tantric intimacy is a conscious process and one must be continually aware to participate. Your conditioning lives in your body and as you discover yourself with touch, massage, meditation, qigong, and many other tools you will begin to innerstand what stories and blocked emotions live in your body which prevent love from being received in every cell. For the forces of the earth and heaven offer their unconditional energy for you at every moment of every day. We are surrounded by unconditional love and energy for us to receive and use, if this is not your experience and truth, then you have stories and beliefs that prevent this experience from being a reality. These techniques are a pathway to releasing that conditioning and coming back to True Nature.

To keep the embers lit, be aware of why the fire was lit. It is the spark of love. What aspects of your being were turned on in and what way when you first felt the fire. Work with that energy, move it through your body, experience it, know it, express it, and dance in it. Connect with your whole body, on all levels, mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. Think of the love as not being yours, do not take it for granted, it is a gift. Tend to it, keep it alive, and it will carry you through all challenges until you find your way back home to your True Nature.

What can a medical Qigong/Breathwork practitioner offer you?

Medical Qigong is a holistic field of medicine that utilizes movement, breath, meditation, and massage as a means of correcting imbalances and achieving optimal energy for success.

The practices run parallel with Chinese Medicine and have been around for thousands of years… however, they have developed into thousands of systems ….some geared towards the treating of specific conditions and diseases (imbalances), other for already healthy individuals who want to increase energy, self-mastery, or spiritual development. .. I offer both.

When I see a client I make an assessment wherein I read their breathing pattern, assess organ health, and energy fields/chakras. Our breathing pattern represents our current state of emotion and health…how the breath is flowing, and where it is not capable of flowing indicates where imbalances are. I can assess how energy is flowing through the body and organs through various Qigong forms.

This gives me the information to offer specific breath/movement/meditations treatments i can offer to address the physical, mental, and emotional imbalances and restore energy flow.

After treatment I can offer prescription movements and practices that an individual would take home to practice.

The whole process is one of increasing an individuals self-awareness, and empowering them to be their own healer. Through an assessment of the breath, organs, and chakras I can give specific insight on where you may be blocked in your life.

I offer these sessions in my clinic and online in Squamish.

For a powerful energy shift, consider coming to one of the many workshops and retreats I have coming up.

It’s an honour to empower individuals with this potent medicine. I plan on pursuing this field till I’m a doctor of medical qigong. I see it as my contribution to the revolution of health that is upon us. The more we can take our health and power into our own hands, the less we rely on broken systems that create dependency.

The secret to good health is within and under our nose. Breath that in and give me a message to explore further.

breathwork #pranayama #qigong

Shift your State Guide

State = mental/emotional/physical

Step 1: Assessment Awareness

  1. Make an intention to see your truth and hold yourself in unconditional love/acceptance. Make a dedication to shift your state and empower yourself fir yourself and the betterment of the all.
  2. Orientated your awareness into your body
  • examples: body scan, self-massage or tapping, yoga asana or qigong, singing.

note: the more resistant you are to what your feeling, the more difficult it will be to focus awareness into the body

  1. Without changing your breathing pattern, witness your breathing quality without judgment
  • Is the breath short, shallow, long, deep, turbid, consistent, etc… are any parts of the body contracted and not receiving breath? (Assess from pelvic floor to throat)
  1. What is your current emotional state
  • Name it
  1. What is your current state of mind
  • What are its qualities: busy, calm, distracted, expansive, etc.
  1. Surrender.
  • Allow yourself to fully experience your current mental, emotional, and physical state without resistance.
  1. Shift

Methods of shifting

A. Change your breathing to become deeper and more full, and breath into blockages

B. Express your emotion and body (sound/vocalization, dance, art, yoga, shaking etc)

C. Feel your emotion, then it’s opposite. Then neutrality. Repeat until no charge is left.

D. Assess the cause of your current state of emotion … why are you holding onto this emotion, what benifit/negative do you have from this emotional state.

  • What is the root of this emotion… where did you first feel it, and what stories and beliefs surround the imprinting of this emotional response.
  1. Return to wholeness and set new intentions
  • When the emotion has been processed Return, return to your natural neutral state of love and acceptance of yourself and your environment. Then direct your energy and intention where you want them.