On Romance

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Romance is an art
It is the outward and creative expression of the heart
It is a way of creating a sacred union
romance is a ceremony of love

Romance can be masculine and feminine
When I step into my feminine, my romance is embued with emotion, its expression is poetry, art, cuisine, dance, and massage. There is a process of beautifying the physical environment, the same cleansing one would do before a healing ceremony.

When I step into my masculine romance, there is solid support and safety, so that a woman may know that she is free to be herself

There is a subtle dance between my masculine and feminine, between leading and allowing. This is the dance of the shiva and shakti. The eternal lovers, with many forms and faces.

The dance of opposites is the dance creation.

Romance should come from the heart. A gift from the heart carries a value beyond its form. For love is transcendental. If a love is not transcendent, if does not not transform your innermost Being, then it is only of the mind and body.

Love is too precious to be mediocre. Come wholly, or do not come at all. Since love is sacred, then it should be treated as such, and romance is the offering, it is the grateful prayer of a grateful spirit who is aware that love is the greatest gift.

We Can be one – poem

You can’t see me
What you see is just a wake
By the time the light reflects off my body and into your eyes I’m already gone
You see where I use to be
And you can never someone by their past

But you can feel me in the present
There’s only one way to feel me though
We can’t be separate, we must connect our Beings
When you can feel me in this way, there is no room for miscommunication
There is no room for illusion
When there is no separation between you and I, there is only love

In order to reach beyond yourself you must transcend everything you thought you once were
Your past must not determine your present
You must be free of all patterns of the past
Free from all unprocessed emotion in the body
Free from your name
Free from everything you once called yourself

Most human’s experience this transcending when they fall in love
Love dissolves the boundaries of the self
But most people fall in love unconsciously, and their boundaries dissolve without full awareness of the process
They often fail to see that they have expanded
Many struggle with the dissolution of their own boundary, their old sense of self still clinging on
But love dissolves boundaries, and when you become conscious of this process you can use it to become the entire cosmos
For if we can reach beyond our self through loving another person, we can reach beyond by loving any person
When humanity extends its love for all people, then we will be one with each other
Then it will extend that same love for all things, realizing then that the entire universe is made of love and it is waiting for you to love it as it loves you so that you can merge into it and become one

I choose to let people die – poem

 

The agreement:
I am consciously or unconsciously choosing the conditions of my existence
If there is an aspect of my life that does not serve my well being, it is my responsibility to ask myself, am I consciously making choices in my life that allow these conditions?
If I can’t conceive of a way that I’m consciously choosing to create an unfruitful state, I must admit that I’m unconsciously choosing for it to be so.
Once you know it, you can’t unknow it.
The reality of this way of thinking is both daunting and empowering
It means that I am consciously and unconsciously choosing to not to help the people on the streets
I am consciously and unconsciously choosing to allow poverty
War
Rape
Theft
Poisoning
What a responsibility that is placed on each of our heads
To become conscious and change
We’re not alone
And I pray for strength and allies, seen and unseen, as I learn to walk a different way
Awareness can be a gift for those who are wiling to change, and a curse for others who attach moral implications to their actions and inaction
When we place a judgement on ourselves we are motivated ourselves through fear
I choose to motivate myself by love
A desire to help
I’m small now, but my universe is growing, as I break down my boundaries, I am free to help
Each day I must ask, what am I choosing?
Is it serving me?

It’s empowering to think in this way because the reality is, I have the power to change, myself and all unfruitful states
I don’t beat myself up for what I haven’t done and what I’m not doing
It’s just where I’m at
But if each day I can make some small improvement in my life I can change
If I change 1% of my life each day, in 100 days I can change 100%
If I can solve one small problem a day, think of what I can do in a lifetime
If I can help one person a day, think of what I can do in a year
If I can love each person I meet, with the respect and care I show for my own heart, think of the fire of love that could grow and catch flame to passionate hearts of humanity, a people who can overcome any challenge. We are the people who can carry the sacred flame of love in our heart, we cannot be defeated, no darkness can penetrate so deep as to extinguish the perfect white light of love.
Yet…perhaps I’m choosing for there to be evil
To be in pain
I am choosing to allow myself and others to suffer
If I am taking responsibility for myself and all other people, I must admit there’s a part of me that chose to be Hitler
I choose to be a dictator
A liar
I am a judgemental god
I am Aries the god of war
I am Kali the destroyer
They are my many faces
I am choosing to teach myself hard lessons
After all, I chose to be born to this earth
I chose the conditions of my existence
I will continue to choose till I have learnt the lessons I have chosen to learn in this life
It’s all my choice, whether its conscious or unconscious
It’s all my choice

 

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The Light of Awareness – poem

There’s is part of you that never sleeps
It is an intelligence that keeps your heart beating and your lungs breathing
This same intelligence keeps the stars shining, the flowers blossoming, and the planets spinning
It is a vital awareness that watches over you
It is not of the body
it is not of the mind
it is not out of reach, you can become the watcher that watches over your life
You can come in contact with this intelligence within you
It pervades every cell in your body
It is the unmoved mover
The source of all motion
It’s the source of the light you see, not merely the sun in the sky, but the light behind your eye
It is the light of awareness
Awareness knows no bounds
It is the part of you that is boundless
Awareness pervades all things, all people are aware, all plants are aware, though they stare at the world with different eyes, they are aware of the same infinite skies above and below.
Even the rocks are aware, man’s way is not the only way, there are infinities upon infinities that consciousness can take
How do we become aware of that which knows what you know, without knowing how you know it? How do you come in contact with the source of all of creation?
There is no method
There is no meditation
No yoga
There is no technique
The limited sense the self that craves to be something more can only expand itself incrementally
Accumulating things one by one will never take you too infinity
You can earn a million dollars a day, and still you will always yearn for more
You can conquer the planet and still you will seek to conquer the stars
You can try and learn the workings of the world and still the vacuum of what you do not know will forever abound.
There is a part of you that craves only the infinite, because there is a part of you that is boundless
So long as you are identified with the limited nature of the body and mind, you cannot know your own boundless nature
There is no method
No technique
It is only when you drop all techniques, that you can truly be involved in the world beyond yourself
Then you are free to become wholly involved in the process of life
Then your resistance to life fades and your tossed in the infinite ocean
No longer living for the small self, but taking part in the entire cosmos as if it were your living breathing body
After all, it is
But even this is not enough to become boundless
it is by grace alone that we become boundless
because there is nothing you, the small self can do, so long as you are acting through the small self you will always be limited by yourself
you must surrender to sea
you must be willing to drown in the infinite ocean
you must let go of me
so that you can become free
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Opening the Heart – Poem

There was an expectation of love
The reality isss pain
Harboured hurt
For two daysss

I sat silence
Sitting with my sadnessss
it began to bubble and rissse

Like a coiled snake slithering from up the spine
I simply surrendered to the floor, to the fetal, and left myself open for all the pain to leave my body
It felt as though 27 yearsss of holding to the pain of birth and every suffering since was precipitating into a single stinging tear drop
The room is dark and I cannot see, but I know the tear drop is as black as a closed coffin
I can feel it burn as it slithers down my face
I’m trembling, convulsing, and my breath is leaving my body
With every inhale I’m struggling to hold onto my life as my body begins to harden and my muscles become rigid
My tongue extrudes beyond the borders of my mouth and a harsh air releases from my lungsss
This is the voice of death
The wretched exhale the dying make as they release their last breath

The sound of their life force leaving the body
The same exhale my grandpa made as he passed into the land of the dead
The same guttural voice that comes from the depths that dragons, demons, and underworldly creatures connect with when they speak from the realms of darknesss
This exhale come from the deepest parts of the lungs,

It comes from the roots of our being which reach down into Hell

———-
I’m dying
My body begins to sweat, a feeble attempt to regulate itself
I begin to tremble and vibrate

Another attempt for my body to harmonize and regulate

I’m struggling for air
Until

I surrender and let go
I allow the process to unfold
If death is near then I welcome her with an open heart
as I surrender my struggle stops and my body goes flaccid
no breath, no body, everything goes black
I witness my body sink into the earth and as I watch from above I remain unattached
There is a sense of calm, the kind of stillness that can only be found after days of meditating in the forest or cave
A realm of peace and harmony
Then in an instant I’m torn atom by atom in 12 directions through 12 dimensions
I’m shattered, the feeling is ineffable and all that comes after is beyond comprehension
Reality begins to unfold at lightspeed

there are rising and falling civilizations entering my Being
Flashes of sacred texts in language I’ve never encountered flash before me

Hieroglyphs, sacred art, sacred structures, sacred geometry
I see my parents growing old and I witness their death

There is immeasurable sadness with no body to express it, it is a realm of pure suffering

A voice speaks from nowhere in a language I’ve never heard, yet I translate their words to mean “you are dead”
Upon hearing this it comes to my attention that there is still breath
No body, but breath
not my breath, but breath
I witness this breath, as one witnesses their breath in deep meditation, not as a breather, but as a witness to a process that happens of itself
I merge with this breath and realize it is made of light
I feel the elements seethe from my body, and my memories begin to dissolve
The earth and metal of my being burn, only to be washed away by water, and the remaining pieces blown into the winds
There is sadness that slithers from hell to heaven, and when it reaches the golden palace of light in the clouds the sadness turns to nothing – no thing – void – shunyata
I oscillate between my separate personal memories, and then into the One Breath of all Being, and with every oscillation I free up a piece of my personal history and offer it the One Breath
This process peels layers of me and my relations and purifies them
But the process fails to complete
I begin to descend down the tail of the snake and back into my senses, but beyond my body
A voice speaks again, and I can’t make sense of the words
Its vibration is unharmonious and it appears to be questioning me
I am trying to speak, but I have no words and no way of understanding
A state of confusion falls like a dense dark fog and fear raptures the ether and air
In a blink of an eye, I open my eyes and I’m back in my home on the floor
I look to my body, and it is green, scaled, and disfigured

Fear creeps through my veins and touches my sacred places
My fingers are elongated like alien hands and I’m witnessing ten-thousand nightmares in every cell
I cry
I collapse to the floor and shiver in the fetal

I cry and cry till I close my eyes find in myself the saddest parts of me own Being
Not only do I encounter all the pain of my personal history, but I see the suffering of many of my relationships lying in the depths of my Being

There is sadness that pours through me, each tear is a holographic memory of a life of suffering of a human being, and as it falls down my cheek their story plays before my soul
Then there is a key
an ancient key that is shaped like the Egyptian ankh, the cross-like symbol of eternal life
The key shines with gold and washes away and clears my light body
My organs compress and release their respective emotions
I feel lighter
I feel my light body vibrate
One last tear begins to form on the medial aspect of my eye
it’s the holograph of my own life and suffering
I witness it rise to life
I watch it fall like the rain
Then I witness it contact the earth and pop like a soap bubble

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